The last train of the night…what an experience to go through, one that I have never previously done until last night! Why did i do it? Well it was either catch this train or pay a lot of money for a 40 mile taxi ride home…I’ll happily become a sardine in a small tin instead! That’s what it’s always like, because do you really think your the only one catching that train home? Nope, you…your friends, their friends and half of the village across the road are thinking the same thing!  The train is packed to the rafters! It’s insane and even as the train leaves, you see people still on the platforms who couldn’t get on the train! Your not sure how to feel because that was the last train of the night, the next one is in like 8 hours…how does this kind of thing happen on a daily basis! Since when human beings treat like cattle on transportation?!

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The train moving at speed you would think is good but it isn’t because loads of people aren’t holding on to something and as the train goes around sharp corners, someone will always trip or step back and like a set of dominoes, one by one…people will go backwards and it just causes chaos because someone always has to have a rant on a train about ow rude people are for not giving them more space! I got kicked at the back of my heel by someone as a train went around the corner…he said sorry but damn it hurt!

You try to remind yourself that it isn’t forever, people will get off at stations and things will calm down but when you get to the stations, it’s a stampede for people trying to get off, they’ll shout for everyone to magically move out of there way because they are coming through! It’s funny when you see the real side of the Human Race at the strangest of times, the whole point of getting a train is to be transported from point A to B but to get squashed, abused…basically , you feel like this

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A sardine in a small can, pushed up against people you don’t know and it can feel…strange…weird in fact because this isn’t what you imagined when you paid the ridiculous ticket price just to get on the train in the first place! Maybe people get drunk so they don’t have to think about it so much? Who knows but it might be a good distraction to the horror of British Transportation! Board the last train of the night, a mad rush for a seat…the evil stare you get from the people you beat to it! The occasional shout for people to move down the carriage…no one ever does…the sarcastic remarks! The cheers from people drinking! strangers asking to sit on your laps…for some reason…the occasional scrap!

And you always get the same kind of people on each train! No matter what day it is, they will be there and you’ll see the same things all the time, such as

  • Being asked to move down the train, even though there is no space left! Yet people moan as if its your fault the train is packed if you can’t move! No matter how many times you tell people that you can’t move any further down the train, they won’t have it…you’ll get called every name under the sun by someone in the massive crowd behind you…because you can’t bulldoze past the crowd in front of you and make space!
  • Drunk people who have had a night out, yet are still drinking on the train and they feel the need to include you in their party, yet get grouchy and judgmental if you refuse
  • People asking to sit on other people’s knees so they don’t have to stand up- Ever had anyone ask to sit on your lap on a train journey before? I saw an elderly man ask a young woman if he could sit on her lap on the train home and she looked so creeped out and refused but he kept trying to sweet talk her until she gave in and just gave him the seat! note that he wasn’t asking politely, he was being forceful about it!

If your ever in this situation, you got to ask yourself the question…why couldn’t I have just caught the train before! Also, for the price I pay for a ticket…I at least expect to be somewhat comfortable on the train for an hour journey…I’ll take standing up if I’m not being shoved into a crowd of people every minute the train speeds up! Not a moan or a rant…it’s funny just how it’s an experience that has you go through so many strange things in a short amount of time…you feel somewhat changed when you depart the train, everyone always has some sort of story to tell someone else the day after! Regardless of how annoying, disgusting, overcrowding this journey can be…it’s never boring!

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