This thread was on a few years ago and I happened to come across it again by accident a few days ago and couldn’t believe what was said. I feel like I’ve matured a bit more since those times but still, I looked back and this is what I found.
WARNING- The names used in this are not the real names of the people involved in this conversation for obvious reasons
Me: Hi! I was diagnosed with Mild Aspergers a few years ago, now more referred to as Autism but I won’t go into that! I have spent a few years hating myself for this because I didn’t understand just what it was as well as having people around me that also didn’t understand as well which made things even harder. I used to be very alone, have no friends etc it was hard because I just couldn’t understand what I was doing that made people stay away from me…maybe it’s when I have meltdowns and need time alone sometimes?? but things have gotten better over the years and I do have friends, a family that loves me and I believe in myself but I’m afraid of slipping back into that quiet me that struggles to be social and step out of my comfort zone…any tips or advice on what to do if I feel nervous or feel down about myself?
Beth: Hi! It sounds like you have done well for yourself but as for the feeling nervous about being social, I bet most people do from time to time so I wouldn’t worry about it, just be yourself and you’ll do fine, you have so far after all! Best of luck.
Gordon: I wouldn’t worry so much, you seem to know what your doing and like you said, you’ve worked to get where you are so…keep at it.
Alex: Not really a big deal, you hated yourself when you were diagnosed and I took from what you said that you eventually grew to accept it and went from that point and grew in confidence. Some can do that but others can’t! You’ll always find those who envious and spiteful of anyone who sounds happy that they have achieved something but well done…you could have stayed miserable but you did something about it.
Me: Thank You
Gordon: As for the Meltdowns, I find it useful to have someone to tell if I need time alone and then step outside for a moment or two before going back in….has helped me a great deal.
Me: I do have a friend in my class who is very understanding, I’ll try to tell him the next time I feel like I can’t cope.
Luke: Why are you lying?
Me: Excuse me?
Luke: Why are you saying that you have Autism?
Henry: Hi, what kind of conversation have I wandered into?
Me: Because I do…what makes you think otherwise?
Luke: You said that you have friends?
Henry: Oh no, he has friends…throw the diagnosis away Luke!
Me: That’s right, I do have friends
Luke: So how can you have Autism?
Me: What do you mean by that?
Luke: I think that I have Autism…I haven’t had a friend in my life, I am always alone and I hate myself so I diagnosed myself with Autism…I’m the one who has it, your just a faker!
Me: What…where did that come from? And how can you diagnose yourself with Autism based of just not having any friends?
Henry: Friends=No Autism in Luke Logic…Am I drunk?
Luke: Shut up Henry…you don’t know what it’s like…I’m always just called depressed or anti social so I must have Autism!
Me: So why have a go at me because I have friends?
Luke: People with Autism don’t have friends, what are you stupid?
Beth: If anyone is stupid on here, it’s you Luke!
Luke: So now your bullying me?! What else did I expect
Luke: I have always found it difficult to mix with people throughout my life. At university my close family thought I would finally come out my shell, become confident, make friends, get a girl friend but I haven’t been able to. I have rituals/habits I like to stick to. I don’t like groupwork and I get shy of people easily, not knowing what to say around people. All signs point towards Asperger.
Luke: No I haven’t had a good day. more of the same (scared of crowds, scared of people, terrible at talking, can’t socialise, coming across as weird and very awkward, coming to terms with the fact I will probably never have a gf etc.) how about you?
Me: Why should I be ashamed to tell anyone I have Autism? It’s like I’m ashamed of a part of myself or something…I have never understood why so many people feel ashamed about it.
Adam: I wouldn’t tell anyone! My life would be over if everyone knew, they’d treat me like garbage!
Luke: Thank you for understanding where I am coming from.
Of course I’m not going to tell people I have Asperger apart from my close family. I want to know myself because it would give an explanation for why I am the way I am.
Me: Is this now your thread to be diagnosed or something, feels like it?
Luke: I have always hated being around big crowds of people. I get scared and nervous like I detest being there, almost feeling threatened. I become very sensitive and my brain/thinking switches off.
This is a huge problem for me because after every lecture or class I have, there are huge crowds of people leaving/going to their lectures and classes. It’s similar when I do something like go to the supermarket. I’m essentially a grown man, I shouldn’t have this problem of being scared around people. Is this a sign of aspergers?
Beth: Being scared of big crowds is completely natural, I used to be intimidated and still a little am of big crowds. Instead of asking silly questions, why don’t you go to the GP and tell them your concerns? And bring a list of the traits and say how you match with them. Remember it’s a “disability” not a mental disorder, and so you would realistically have physical symptoms as well, such as motor problems. You may have an anxiety disorder or personality disorder but not necessary Asperger’s.
Me: I’m not ashamed, you can do what you want but do not make me feel bad for having friends!
Luke: But your a liar and shut up Beth
Me: And your a troll!
Luke: I am not, I have Aspergers! Feel sorry for me with your friends!
Me: I feel a lot of bitterness from you, I’m not trying to brag…I just wanted to show that you can have a great life with Autism, it isn’t all loneliness and not doing anything!
Luke: Liar! People with Autism don’t have friends, they just don’t!
Beth: Your an idiot Luke!
Luke: And you shouldn’t even be here, girls don’t get Autism
Beth: What did you say?
Adam: Bit of a sexist ain’t ya Luke?
Luke: I’m just speaking the truth, I mean…come on
Henry: Still thinking I’m drunk…reading that Luke is a depressed sexist that may or may not have Autism and he’s calling one guy with Autism a liar because he has friends???Knew that last Jagerbomb was a mistake!
Beth: Maybe you should go to bed Henry
Luke: What did I do?
Me: Your being offensive Luke
Luke: So many liars online…fakers
Me: Oh shut up…I didn’t accuse you of making anything up…why is having a friend mean I don’t have Autism…where on Earth did you get that stupid idea from? And please let your response be an intelligent one or get off this thread because I’m getting sick of you!
Luke: I have never had a friend in my life, I’m always alone yet you sound like you have friends, a successful life and a partner…how can you say you have Autism when you can be social?
Me: Ok…fair enough, I see where you are coming from but you can have Autism and be able to socialise…it isn’t impossible at all! It can be hard but if you keep trying than anyone can make a friend! I still get nervous from time to time and have the occasional meltdown as well but my friends understand that and they often let me have a few minutes to myself before asking if I’m alright…I feel lucky to find a group of friends that understand me and like me for me…it took me a long time to find a group of people like this, a lot of hard work as well
Beth: Well done, no one should just give up because they diagnosed themselves online and have convinced themselves of having Autism! Look Luke, maybe try seeing a doctor and try to get a diagnosis if your unsure but don’t go online and accuse others who have been diagnosed of being liars…Autism isn’t an exclusive club or anything but the OP just wanted some advice and you shut him down…because he has friends….besides….why would anyone fake having Autism…not something that’s much fun to pretend to have!
Luke: I knew you were a liar
Beth: Oh for god sake!
Henry: CM Punk is facing Randy Orton at Wrestlemania…anyone interested in that??
Me: I tried to be nice but your just throwing it in my face…YOU CAN HAVE FRIENDS…ANYONE CAN!
Luke: Except people with Autism
Beth: This is just ridiculous now, your probably just some stupid kid trolling because your bored
Luke: I’m not some kid, I have Autism and have never had a friens
Beth: Your assuming you have Autism and you assume that because you have no friends but perhaps it’s for another reason?
Luke: Excuse me?
Beth: Well your not very nice…ever think your attitude is the reason you have no friends?
Luke: IT’S BECAUSE I HAVE NO FRIENDS! STOP BULLYING ME!
Carla: I was going to type in some helpful advice for the OP but began reading comments and saw rage! WTF?! This is disgusting
Luke: Thank you, you see the liars as well
Carla: Not them…your the D***
Luke: Don’t bully me!
Carla: I have Autism, care to call me a liar as well?! I dare you little man
Luke: Your a liar
Henry: Ouch, he didn’t hold back
Beth: Oh Luke…
Me: It’s a troll, he’s trying to wind you up…no one is this stupid…surely?
Adam: Yeah, I did want to defend him because he sounded like he was calling out for help but he’s pushing buttons and being offensive
Luke: Next think you’ll tell me, Women can have Autism as well!
Beth: THEY CAN!
Me: All I wanted was some advice, this is getting out of hand!
TO BE CONTINUED