I do not own the article used in this blog nor claim to. It is the property of the Metro Newspaper!
We have a newspaper in the UK called the Metro and I found an article called Five Conversations I’ve had To Have About Autism and it basically talks about while we have differences when it comes to having Autism, we have recurring themes that we can all go through so I thought I’d look through the article and see if I can relate to any of them.
- 1) The Apology– It talks about often having to apologise to other people for either having Autism or if someone you know like a child for having Autism in certain situations, the Metro uses an example of a child with Autism being ‘mean’ to another child and a parent complaining to the other parent about it. The parent who has the Autistic child apologises and explains that their child is Autistic and it goes on saying that apologising for their child’s behaviour all over the place and I immediately said that I cannot relate to this issue at all as I have never apologised to anyone for what I have nor will I ever…whether I do when I become a parent is another matter though! True that understanding of Autism has gotten better over the years but it’s nowhere near to the level that we all need it to be and I don’t think I would ever say ‘I;m sorry but my child is Autistic because I just feel like I’ using it as an excuse…I don’t want to go about with the impression that Autism is the reason my child would act the way they are doing…maybe some do but as I got older, I felt slightly ashamed that I found it easy to use the Autism card if I did anything wrong…I was responsible for my actions! Nope, I can’t relate to this first one but I imagine others will be able to.
- 2) Telling Your Child– This is one I might be able to relate to in the future when I have children of my own but as for me being told, I was a teenager and was well aware that I was diagnosed with Autism, I didn’t need my parents to tell me but I sometimes wish that I was diagnosed a few years earlier when I was at my special needs school so I was in a better environment to learn how to cope with it as things could have ended up much better for me but if I was a parent who had a child who was young and was diagnosed, I would tell them straight away and help them in every way In could, I’ve been in the battle…I know when a meltdown is around the corner and when something is going to go down…not many others in my life really know and I’m not sure my wife would know much about it, she struggles enough with me to be honest. I could wait until my child was a little older, easily but why wait? I know first hand that it didn’t work…I went through years of confusion and anger with the timing and it slowed me down but then again, not everyone will be in that situation so for some it may work, for others it won’t.
- 3) The myth-buster– ‘Vaccines cause Autism’ ‘You must love Rain Man!’ ‘Everyone with Autism is the same’ No, Yes and….NOPE! Funny how everyone looks things up in the internet for everything nowadays, yet people still don’t know much about Autism, it’s like spelling something wrong on a computer…how is that possible with spell checker? True you shouldn’t believe everything you see online…especially the Vaccine stuff..I worry about the future generations that seem to be getting stupider I’ll have you know! More vaccine talk and I roll my eyes! Have fun with all the diseases your children get because you read an article by a phony doctor who was proven wrong! Every time…soon the be the lazy generation when technology does EVERYTHING for us! Anyway…so many stereotypes about Autism that the majority seem to believe just like that…’it’s true because the internet said so!’ I find myself having to explain to people that I’m not that good at Maths…I’m nothing like Sheldon Cooper and that I have friends and I am married…I’ve even been accused of faking it because I have friends! I hate stereotypes on all levels because they are all so stupid…I’m moving on from this one before I lose my good mood and need a soya drink
- 4) Telling Your Family- I personally don’t understand why telling the family would be such a big deal…your all family at the end of the day and if something like a family member having Autism is going to change the way you care or see them…your not worth my time, ain’t never speaking to you again! Autism doesn’t have to be such a life changing moment if the people around the individual are loving and understanding! Patience is needed when it comes to loud noises, crowds of people and amongst many other things when it comes to Autism but if the person has people who don’t make him feel bad for it and help him get through it, then things are ok, correct? Sure it might take many attempts to get through a shopping trip without having a meltdown but babies cry and scream as well and people get annoyed by that…people get annoyed by nearly anything almost everywhere…whether it be a shop, park, cinema or public transport….loud noises will irritate most people, Autistic or not, the only difference is helping the person with Autism understand and that they don’t have to feel bad or ashamed for it! Having people around you that are caring and always there if you need them is vital, DO NOT make them feel alone or worthless because of it! You can’t shield them from everything forever though! One day, they have to learn to stand by themselves but you will always be there still because that’s what a family is supposed to do!
- 5) ‘The Support Network’ – This one just talks about the Facebook posts and groups online that we’ve all seen before where you will find someone that believes they are always right and everyone else is wrong, people who can’t see anything negative etc It suggests that everyone who has Autism have different ways with dealing with what they have, the same method will not work for everyone but some may be able to relate somewhat. This one actually makes using the online groups seem unavoidable as a method of dealing with Autism or a venomous pit where you are always wrong and that is sometimes the case but I have found it to be helpful a bit as well…it’s nice to know that your not the only person in the world who struggles with such things…it’s enough to make me feel a bit positive that I’m not alone at least!