Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and old lang syne?

Happy New Year everybody! We say farewell to 2017 and welcome 2018 and that makes me overjoyed because I hate odd number years! Yes I’m weird like that as I feel more confident and lucky when the year ends with an even number! So bring on 2018 everybody and let’s make this one better than the last!

Before I go on though, part of me just sees New Years as another day, yes I enjoy it and I’ll celebrate it but once midnight hits and we all sing and cheer…that’s it, back to normal and we begin a new year a bit quietly I might add…January is always a quiet month for me so I always wonder why so many people travel long distances across country and spend vast amounts of money I might add, after they already have done these things a week prior for Christmas…just for a few minutes on the 31st of December? In London, you have people standing for hours in the cold for the fireworks, when you can watch it for free on TV, some even came from Taiwan or further afield! For fireworks! It’s not a bad thing to do by any means so go ahead and have a blast, I just find it funny how people moan about spending so much on Christmas, yet do the same thing a week later…maybe we all just like to moan from time to time? Life’s hard so who doesn’t like to unwind and celebrate something, just don’t be shocked if I don’t listen to you moan about how much you spent doing it the day after!

Moving on to Autism now, the start of a new year can bring hope that things will go a lot better for an individual than the previous one as I find myself reflecting on stuff that didn’t perhaps go to plan and what I can possibly do to make things more positive and better this time around…sounds like a broken record to be honest because I feel like I say this every January…it’s like a new years resolution that fails after a week!

A main challenge for anyone with Autism is being social and making friends, getting a job, getting married etc You see it all over the internet, books etc It’s a task for someone with Autism to do what someone without Autism can do, twice the effort etc You’ve probably heard it all a million times already! But one thing that I do everyday is something that helps a great deal and it’s rather simple as well but it works.

Do Your Best  

Basically, that’s all anyone should be able to do in this situation…just the best that you can do! No one should expect more or less really when it comes to socializing and not any other person can make this happen except for you! When I went to University, I had to force myself to go out and try to mingle with people, it wasn’t easy by any standard and at times, it didn’t work at all but I had successes as well in the long run and was generally a liked member of my class, I mean I got quite the cheer when I went to collect my degree on graduation day and for me, that speaks volumes because I can remember times when something like University was impossible, I had no interest in going out and spending time with people, not a chance!

I know what it’s like to have no friends and honestly, I hated every moment of it! Yes I enjoy time to myself but deep down, I knew I was lonely and I couldn’t think of a reason why I actually was. Could it have been my fault? Yes…it somewhat was…because I wasn’t making much of an effort or I just didn’t think it was that important really to go out and possibly humiliate myself by trying to make friends, if I failed…I’d just be mocked for it and be even more alone…if that was possible back then. School wasn’t fun for me, especially after my diagnosis but who am I kidding, it went wrong for me long before I even knew what Autism was!  Yet when I went to College and University, new worlds opened up for me and I was able to grow and learn more about myself because of it…I still made errors along the way but because I had better people around me than I ever did in school, I could cope and become more confident, resulting in the lifelong friends I have today!

I did my best along the way, accepting that I would have setbacks and that not everyone would like me along the way, some people didn’t but many did and I realized that growing up, I wanted everyone to like me and it cost me a lot because I said yes to everyone and felt used in the end, I couldn’t see that some had caught on and were using me…I respect myself far too much now to ever let that happen again but it took a lot of self belief that I wasn’t worthless, finding the right people to help me and a little bit of luck for it all to happen.

I was also tired of feeling cynical and being negative all the time, it was just as much my fault for what happened to me as it was everyone else, I let it happen…I didn’t try to stop it until it was too late and accepting that helped me a lot, I took the responsibility and learned from it, helping me grow as a person…I don’t moan about how others chose to live their lives or how I feel jealous that many can easily go out and make friends whereas It takes me ages to make just one! Life is to precious and short to worry about all of that, just do the best that you can and enjoy every single moment because good times will come to you! However, you have to make that happen…don’t just sit there and wait for me, get out there and make it happen yourself…yes bad times will happen but so will good ones…you just have to be a little bit brave and you’ll see the rewards for your efforts, not everyone out there will ignore you, some will see the attempts and efforts you put in…I for one don’t talk all the time with people I don’t know as much but over time, I find myself engaging in conversation with work colleagues more and more and as much as I feel nervous about it all, I give it a go at least and I always feel happy every time I have one!

So this year, I’ll continue to do the same and try to do a little bit more each time because I believe that I can, if I try hard enough…I myself can make 2018 a good year and with a little bit of luck, that’s what will happen….especially because me and my wife will try for a baby!

Happy New Year World! 

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